Marriage is not about age; it’s about finding the right person.
Life, as we know, is not a bed of roses, From childhood till the time you get old, you have to make so many major decisions which are sometimes confusing and infuriating. These decisions are important because our future is based on these decisions. Choosing a school to college to job..there are decisions to make everywhere, but the one that tops the list of Life decisions is Choosing a Life Partner.
This is one of the most crucial decision not just because you are choosing a partner for yourself but because he is someone with whom you are going to share your life fully.
Now the question arises, How to find that right person?
We all have our own preferences, likes and dislikes about everything in life. So is in this case, while choosing a partner, some prefer good looks over everything, there are others who prefer intelligence overlooks, and for some wealth is what matters the most. So, it depends on person to person. But when finding that perfect match, you cannot focus on just one thing and overlook other things.
Today, we are going to discuss with you what all points to focus on while choosing your partner-
There may be no such thing as the perfect partner, but an ideal partner can be found in someone who has developed themselves in certain ways that go beyond the surface. While we each seek out a specific set of qualities that are uniquely meaningful to us alone, there are certain psychological characteristics both you and your partner can aim for that make the flame not only stronger, more passionate and more fulfilling.
Many of these qualities won’t be apparent to us when we first meet someone, but as we get to know the people we date, these are invaluable traits to both looks for in them and to strive for in ourselves. These ideal attributes include:
Being “grown up” isn’t merely a matter of not acting like a kid anymore. It’s not about a boyfriend who remembers to take out the trash or a girlfriend who never runs late. These qualities are nice, but to truly grow up means making an active effort to recognize and resolve negative influences from our past. An ideal partner is thus willing to reflect on his or her history and is interested in understanding how old events inform current behaviours.
When people mature emotionally, they are less likely to re-enact or project past experiences in their current relationships. They develop a strong sense of independence and autonomy, having differentiated from destructive influences from early in life.
The ideal partner is open, undefended and willing to be vulnerable. No human being is perfect, so finding someone who is approachable and receptive to feedback can be a huge asset to a lasting union. When someone is free-thinking and open-minded, it enables them to be forthright in expressing feelings, thoughts, dreams and desires, which allows you to truly know them.
3. Respect & Independence
Ideal partners treat each other with respect and sensitivity. They do not try to control each other with threatening or manipulative behaviour. They are respectful of their partner’s distinct personal boundaries, while at the same time remaining close physically and emotionally. Valuing and respecting our partners’ sovereign minds and not trying to change them allows us to really know them as separate people.
4. Sense of Humor
A good sense of humour definitely eases the tense moments in a relationship. Being able to laugh at ourselves makes life much easier. Plus, it is one of life’s greatest joys to be able to laugh with someone close to us. A sense of humour can be a lifesaver in a relationship.
Developing our ability to be empathic helps us understand and attune to our partner. When two people in a couple understand each other, they become aware of the commonalities that exist between them and also recognize and appreciate the differences. When both partners are empathic, that is, capable of communicating with feeling and with respect for the other person’s wants, attitudes and values, each partner feels understood and validated.
6. Honesty & Integrity
Dishonesty confuses the other person, betraying their vulnerability and shattering their sense of reality. Nothing has a more destructive impact on a close relationship between two people than dishonesty and deception. Even in painful situations such as infidelity, the blatant deception involved is often equally, if not more, hurtful than the unfaithful act itself. The ideal partner strives to live a life of integrity so that there are no discrepancies between words and actions. Honesty builds trust between people.