The 5Cs for a strong marriage

Marriage is a fertile ground for conflicts. It is also one of the best relationships one can have and experience in their lifetime. There are certain ingredients that are needed in marriage to make it a wonderful and accomplished one.

The perfect combination of all these small ingredients will lead to an amazing and tasteful environment for the marriage to bloom and grow.

Inequalities are not necessarily bad for a relationship — in fact, many people come together because of them. Indeed, defining and maintaining a sense of equality is highly subjective, and a couple’s ability to reach agreement on how and where boundaries lie is part of the challenge.

The different Cs or the 5 Cs are considered really important by the marriage specialist or those working and helping people to help them have a happy married life.

In this blog we are going to explain and discuss about the most important Cs of marriage.

By inculcating these in your behaviour and paying heed to what it can do to your marriage life will surely help you in building the happy and healthy marriage.

Communication

Communication is about effectively articulating thoughts in such a way that the other person understands them as intended. Obviously, this is a two-way street; the other party must also interpret such expressions “as intended.” The goal is the minimize the disparity between the parties’ collective understanding of communication, and that is achieved by minimizing bias towards self-interest. That is, statements or expressions should not be viewed as being advantageous to one party or the other, but with the goal of feeding the relationship.

Commitment

The role of commitment in a relationship is not so much that both people have the same level of commitment towards one another, only that their respective commitment profiles are acceptable by the other. When both feel comfortable with whatever that equilibrium is, it’s usually evident by virtue of a healthy relationship.

Compassion

Like Commitment, Compassion is also a frame of mind. It is more than just having a sense of another person.

Whenever relationships don’t work, it’s almost always that either or both partners are not looking at the other person’s point of view and appreciating the how and why they feel as they do. Such an investment of emotional attention and willingness requires compassion.

At the end of the day, true and authentic compassion usually results in less conflict during disagreements and a shorter path to resolution.

Chemistry

Is the natural and mutual flow with and between each other. It’s not just about physical or sexual attraction. A big part of chemistry is the desire to know more about other the person. In this desire to know more, you are truthful with each other; being open, curious, accepting, and respectful, even playful as you interact together.  

The problem with chemistry is its inconsistency, especially in the beginning of a relationship. One may feel strongly about someone at first, but differently a week later, or under a different set of conditions. And of course, vice versa -people find their chemistry grows stronger as other aspects of a relationship develop. Having a strong chemistry will help you in building a healthy relationship.

Consensus

Is about cooperation-seeking the win-win, and is the result of a conscious and unconditional relationship. Consensus keeps in mind and balance the importance of both the goal/end in mind, and the relationship. It allows for mutual opinions and ways of being. There is dialogue, negotiation and compromise. Consensus is about power with. Consensus requires effective and respectful communication skills, flexibility, and openness to understand the others point of view; while expressing your own view. It requires the ability and willingness to find the common ground. Honoring your individual differences and working with your similarities, builds consensus.

Relationships like life, change, and situations happen that can impact any of these C’s in unproductive ways. So being aware of how life situations can impact these C’s is vital and an act of love, caring and concern for the relationship, and the two of you in it.

Communicate your thoughts and share your story. Dress up and show up as a team member instead of working against your partner. Choose to accept and value your partnership enough to lean in instead of push away. Before you know it, you’ll feel connected and that awful sense of loneliness will be replaced by the deep, affirming connection you signed up for in the first place.

 

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